Thursday— Shrugging off the haters, a local freshman showed up to school this morning with a fresh take on an old classic. Wearing his white Ralph Lauren Polo shirt and a pair of J. Crew navy blue chinos, the young student watched as boys and girls alike stepped aside as he strolled through the hallway, eyes tracking his every move. As he passed through the swamp, casually slinging the second strap of his Patagonia backpack over his left shoulder, Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” played over the PA speaker exclusively designated for fire drills.
Trinitarians had much to say about the fashion breakthrough. “Mark just really took a chance, and it paid off in a big way!” remarked a sophomore who asked to remain anonymous. Another sophomore stated “I heard some peers talking about Mark’s outfit, and I assumed they were overhyping it. But then I watched him strut through the cafeteria with a plate of pasta in hand, and let me tell you, that marinara wasn’t the only thing revved up.”
Reached for comment after one of the finest days in Trinity’s storied 309 years, the freshman remarked, “I just wanted to do something special to give back to this school. Creating change isn’t easy, but I believe we must take some uncomfortable risks to see real progress in our society.” Rumor has it that this freshman might soon take things to the next level; there’s even been mention of a navy crew neck with “Trinity” emblazoned in yellow lettering across the chest.