Friday— It started out like any other Friday for Anton Stengel ‘19. As he made his way from advising to the Hawley Chapel for Community Time, he wasn’t expecting anything out of the ordinary. “When I saw the pillow on stage and realized it would be another meditation session, I thought I could catch up on some sleep” the junior remarked. “But when Mr. Morehouse told me to sit up a little straighter, I felt the pressure of my final history paper start to melt away. And when he told me to breath in through my nose and out through my mouth, my mind felt strangely clear.” For the next 4 minutes, he sat still in the pew, amidst classmates trying to make up for only sleeping four hours last night with a 5 minute nap. “And when Morehouse said we could open our eyes, I opened them and saw everything. Everything. And it all made sense. I saw the balance of life.” He was seen shortly after Community Time levitating in the junior swamp, offering advice to anyone who could solve his riddle.
News of his revelations was met with a mixed response throughout the upper school. One junior said of him, “At first, I was skeptical. But then I saw him answering questions in the swamp and thought I would ask him a question nobody knows the answer to. So I asked him how to get an A in Muniz English, and he knew. That guy’s legit.” However, not everyone took to kindly to Stengel’s revelation. Just an hour later, he was thrown out of Math for informing his teacher that her teaching style “disrupted the energy flow of the universe.” Mr. Morehouse, reached for comment, shrugged off his guidance to Mr. Stengel’s enlightenment. “Dude, just another day at the office.”